IC contact. Drift Fleet.

[edwinjarvis]

 

 

Hello, this is Edwin Jarvis; I'm unable to answer the phone at the moment, but leave a message and I assure you I will respond as soon as possible.

Comments

[edwinjarvis]

[V E R Y W E L L

He will be hiding and wait to catch you, sir, just you watch.

He will point the finger at this flamingo tormentor when he does, too!!]

[ahappylie]

[He's already off the ship, Jarvis. Come and get him.

]

[edwinjarvis]

[One of these days he will nab you, villain.

... Or he'll, you know, just send a message.]

Mr. Soujirou, we are all adults here, are we not?

This is getting quite — silly! The flamingo torture must stop!

[ahappylie]

[What? He did nothing of the sort!]

Flamingo torture?

[hehehheehehEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH]

Jarvis-san, what are you talking about?

[edwinjarvis]

Mr. Soujirou, [if i say your name crossly enough many times will you admit it all] there are only so many people I actually gave those terrible little flamingos to.

[And one of them has left the fleet, soooooo.]

[ahappylie]

[if Hijikata Toshizou cannot get this man to break, Jarvis, there is little hope anyone else can.]

Oh? But I gave all of mine away.

[Aka, I hid one on your ship and then squirreled the rest away in hiding spots around the Goldstone.]

Why? Did something happen?

[edwinjarvis]

... There is something utterly dastardly in your act of innocence.

[damn u, okita, damn u to heckie]

[ahappylie]

[he was already going to heckie, so this just hastens his journey]

I didn't realize innocence could be dastardly. Did the flamingos do something to you again, Jarvis-san? Another sponsor drop perhaps?

1/2 double the face

[edwinjarvis]

[edwinjarvis]

Perhaps I should put them in an incinerator on the next waystation we visit, then.

[ahappylie]

You could, but what if the ghosts of the flamingos come back to haunt you. You wouldn't want to be haunted by dead flamingos, would you?

[edwinjarvis]

..............

Mr. Soujirou, are we not mature adults here? This must stop.

[ahappylie]

Are we?

[No, seriously, are they?]

And stop what? Having a nice conversation?

[edwinjarvis]

[HEAD IN HANDS.

He doesn't even have the heart to deny treats for this gross sin against him.

Alas!!]

A nice conversation indeed. Perhaps we can negotiate flamingo removal in exchange for snacks?

[ahappylie]

[This is how he gets to you, Jarvis. He finds your weak point and exploits it.]

Oh! If you would like help in keeping the flamingos away, I'm sure I can figure something out to help you in exchange for a treat or two as a reward.

[This is not as he wanted, but he will 100% take it.]

[edwinjarvis]

[... Phew.

Blessed day.]

I am more than willing to offer edible goods for your flamingo-thwarting services.

[You hooligan.]

[ahappylie]

I'll do my best then.

[For cake.]

But I can't guarantee that I'll be able to stop all of them. As you said, they're very dastardly birds.

[edwinjarvis]

Well. The amount of edible goods will be certainly tied to how may flamingos elude your skillful eye.

[ahappylie]

I see! So the more flamingos I keep from your ship, the more I'll be rewarded?

[Meaning he could just...lie about how many he's kept away.]

[edwinjarvis]

More along the lines of starting with a maximum number of treats and watching them dwindle down for every flamingo that escapes your sight.

[NICE TRY]

[ahappylie]

Well, you'll have to inform me of the maximum number and how much each period of time is before they replenish.

[edwinjarvis]

Hmm.

What do you suppose a fair maximum number is?

[ahappylie]

[How many indeed....]

How much can you make in a day?

[edwinjarvis]

... I will make ten small treats.

And we can alter based on productivity thereon.

[ahappylie]

[10 a day and 7 days a week means 70 treats a week.

He can afford to let a few go if that's the bargain he's going to be making.]

That sounds fair~ Although the one today shouldn't count toward my daily total. I had no idea they were already haunting you.